Lunch Of The Living Dead

By John Constantine

Well, I just got back from having a luncheon with the chairman of the democratic national committee.  It was me and about fifteen or twenty other people in the room.

It was pretty cool.

Mind you, it's not really a big deal to get noticed by the democrats for donations.  The democrats are still far worse than the republicans as far as fund raising goes.  If you actually get invited to a luncheon with the republican national committee chairman, then you are giving some serious bucks.

The composition of this particular day's group was interesting.  The group is The League of Conservation Voters (LOCV).  They do very good things, and I like them a lot.

So, the composition of the group consisted of a retired news columnist, a semi-retired lawyer, someone who I think was from a PR firm, a couple of lobbyist, and a few others I didn't figure out, and then a lot of people who were in the top ranks of the LOCV and one of their friends.

There were only three of us there that were just members in the LOCV.

Kinda neat.

I got there late, which was okay.  They weren't really getting started, and I found a nice seat next to a very nice woman who I think was a lobbyist.

But, I'm the only one in the room in jeans, a pony tail and a t-shirt that reads "Smart Lazy People Run The Planet".

Everyone else is in a suit.

So, I sit down and ease drop on the conversations happening around me while I poke at my salad.  I don't really know anyone, and there's a salad in front of me.  So I have to do something.

The chairman is working the tables and is making small talk, practicing his jokes.  Sounds like a reasonable guy.  I hear a bunch of jokes about congressman Condit.  Well, they weren't so much jokes, as admissions of guilty addiction to the on going drama.

And then the nervous laughter.

Lot's of nervous laughter.

There was a meme that spread across the group that was particularly interesting.  There apparently was a story about a study that showed that republicans are three times more likely to have nightmares than democrats.

Well, duh.

But it was funny to see the meme spread and move across a small group of fifteen (or twenty) like a virus.

Someday I'll bore you with my take on meme classification, group connectivity and pattern development and critical member roles.  But I digress.

To continue, one of the weirdest events was that the person who did the introduction (I apologize, I'm bad with names) made a reference to the story about republican nightmares when introducing the DNC chairman.  Then, the chairman got up and made a joke about the same story.

Now, it wasn't weird that he made a joke about the same story.  Considering that it was a meme swarming all over the room, it would be odd if he didn't make some reference to it.

What was weird is that he did it right after the introduction, without seemingly noticing his introduction contained the same joke.  Or that the meme had already infected everyone in the room at least ten times.

So he was either reading from a script, or it was purely his spine talking.  Without a teleprompter I would assume the latter.  However, he did seem to have notes on the podium, and he could be just following the script.

In any event, he was generally talking about the environment, and what a hot voter item it is.  JHCORFC.  The California energy SNAFU is all tied in with the environment and President Bush's energy policy isn't exactly environmentally friendly.

So the main thrust was that the chairman believes that the environment is a wedge issue with the voters.  Consistently, poll after poll, there is a wide gap between democrats and republicans about environmental issues.

Gee.  No surprise.

But I voted for Nader, and he lost me when he started dis'ing him.  I voted for Nader because I think he's honest and he's rational.  If you don't agree, that's fine.  But you don't get my vote by disparaging someone's character.  You get my vote by talking about the issues and giving me a reason to vote.

Basically, his entire argument is now "Nader is in it all for ego".

Sorry, this is just not something that's going to sway me.

No answer for all the things Nader says that I agree with.  No defense for the overwhelming belief that I have that there is very little difference between the democrats and republicans.

No strategy or policy proposals about the environment.  Just "we think we have a lever and we're going to use it".

One of the people in the audience asked a good question:

"How far do you think the democrats will have to move towards the right on environmental issues to capture more voters".

His answer wasn't one, but what his waving hands were trying to say was that "we won the popular vote last election", trying to imply that the democrat's position wouldn't have to move to the right.

And the check is in the mail.

But what do you expect from the chairman of the DNC.  This guy was slick, he was personable, and I still don't know what they are going to do for the environment.

I did meet some interesting people, and it was just cool in general to be there at all.

But I'm still voting Nader in 2004.

DNC - If you want my vote, you'll actually have to do something concrete and actually talk about the issues in a rational manner.

But, I like the democrats a hell of a lot better than I like republicans.  They have more interesting sex lives and seem like human beings.

Or at least that's the illusion.  And an illusion is better than nothing in this new millennium.